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It is more shameful to distrust our friends than to be deceived by them. --Confucius-- But what about the pain factor? I mean, when one realizes they have been deceived it can be so life shattering and jolting that it is hard to trust and believe in anyone or anything but most importantly, Your Self and Your ability to prevent being deceived again. How about the reality shifter when you must get honest with yourself about your parents, and who they are, or who they aren't? We tend to placate ourselves about the truth of our parents because, let's face it It's a big bad world out there and we Need our parents to protect us, teach us, feed us,provide for us, you know the basics of surviving as children knowing we can't do it alone, we have to have an adult! However, when the adult in charge of this for us is, well, not up to the task (for whatever reason) or not reliable (for whatever reason) and we get an inkling of this lack of safety,we may learn to cope with this with denial,or modifying reality to create the safety we need. Then, somehow by the grace of divine we make it to adulthood, chronologically speaking, and we have some unhealthy coping mechanisms in place, things we learned to do to make us feel safe. Only, these things don't work anymore and we start to have to deal with it, or not. We need to take down the coping mechanisms and create new healthy strategies for life. In doing so, we have to let go of the false "realities" we created. Maybe my dad is Not the hero I believed he was, maybe my mom can not fix everything,maybe she isn't my friend, maybe I am not the best writer, maybe my husband doesn't Love Me....... Whatever our false realities have been that served us need to be let go of and the lessons integrated and the learning moves us on to new experiences and new ways of going through life. How does one cope with this shattering? How does one bounce back and TRUST again, trust life, trust people, trust Yourself? Take a look at our Notre Dame fella and his On-Line Love, or so he thought. His comments about well, what I went through was real, the pain, the feelings,It was real even if "She" wasn't . Or was it? What a nasty prank to play on someone! How does one not allow such things to happen to them? Can we really prevent things like this from happening? Why does life have to include This type of experience? Is this what it is all about? If finding one self is a life long journey of morphing,continually dying and being reborn again and again, it would seem reflective of the process of life itself. So then What IS REAL? Who are YOU, Who IS this person, this relationship,this situation,this.......? How does one navigate the ever changing tides of Life and find the flexibility and Courage to continue to bob back up for more after being in the undertow? Were you ever in an undertow anyway? What is Reality? Where Is it found.......
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If you have ever had to put a pet "to sleep" because of an illness you will understand the pain involved in this decision. I was so excited the day I picked up my new baby boxer T Rex. He was a seal brindle boxer from Texas (the name). He was so ugly, I couldn't not take him. He was obviously the runt, rolled skin, dark black face with pink nose and running droopy eyes. He grunted and made funny noises when I picked him up and the girl just watched me in surprise as there was an immediate bond and she knew although he was not the pick of the liter,he was going home. I showed him off every where to everyone and most of the time the reactions were the same- A face only a mother could love...
And LOVE LOVE LOVE I did. I poured so much love on my new son and he just ate it up. However, he was an incredible hand full and REALLY, only a mother could love (lol). When i had his ears cropped (would not go through that again!!!) it was a nightmare and I discovered quickly, he was definately my son. He was way too smart for his (and my) good, way too stubborn, defiant when felt slighted, and the most emotionally expressive facial expressions ;times it was hard to remember that he was a dog! He didn't think HE was and I didn't treat him that way either. Needless to say I could go on and on with stories but back to original point of this "story".... It was obvious that my son had a full life and was struggling with pain and illness to hang on but I didn't have the heart to watch it. I was ready to deliver my third human son within weeks and lugging my Rex (90lbs) in my arms and carrying him outside to do his duty was taking its toll on me. When he didn't move at all for several days and looked at me so mercily I wept while laying on the floor next to him for a day as we decided together, what we needed to do. Sorry, needed a moment to choke back the tears as i am plummeted back to that time.... Standing in the vet office saying our good-byes I thought certainlly I would go into labor, it was herendous! As the vet did his job and i held my boy sobbing he placed his head so gently on my Baby bump and let out a final sigh. I stood frozen for awhile before the vet said, "I think, maybe it would be good for you to leave now"....... Skip the coping,or not, story and slide on a few weeks past to, bam! Re-Enter my Rex. Awoke in the middle of the night, I sat up and looked at the chair across from the bed and there sat My Rex! Looking at me and snorting his famous greeting. I sat staring for a few minutes trying to figure out if I was dreaming or actually awake when a gush of blood enveloped me. I was awake for sure and hemoraging everywhere. I ran for the bathroom for a towel and I will fast forward a bit here but on to ER! It was an emergency delivery and I was facing death, not sure if my son would be ok or what. My mom raced to the house to care for the other two human sons as I was in for a fight for my and my new son's life. When my mom came to welcome our new son she had a talk with me in the hospital. She explained her version of the terror she faced when she came to the house. She said, I though i was just out of my mind with fear. Now, however, I realize what an undeniable miracle that occurred! You see, she explained that as she walked up the walk to the door there was Rex, standing guard at the door. He greeted her with his usual snorting and dancing and showing her how happy he was she was there. He stayed with her a little while as she addressed the horrific scene and went to bed for a little rest before the other two human boys awoke to the surprise. I love my son Rex and he frequently lets me know he is on guard for me even today! Some bonds are fated, some bonds are indestructable, Some loves will transcend ALL ELSE!!! ! I LOVE You my son T REXAS from TEXAS!!! Remember the old Wind Song commercial, "If you want to capture someones attention, just whisper". How true the bell rings,yes?
Our heart whispers to us continually but will not shout! If you only pay attention to the loud thoughts you will miss your heart thoughts. Whisper to me ever so gently, softly, I WILL listen. In the stillness of the silence I speak strongly, wise est... Though the loud will be my enchantress I will hold longer still for the beauty of the space between attention,inhale and awareness,exhale It has been scientifically proven that our thought generation is not limited to our minds/brain, but that, our heart generates thought and is Far more powerful a generator than our mind/brain. As an intellectual society firmly rooted in logic,science,and driven strongly and comfortably from our mental bodies,mind/brain,left brain strengths and measurements it is easy to identify ,justify, recognize and follow the thoughts that are generated from our minds/brain and discount,ignore,misunderstand heart-based "things" . It is also a strong tendancy to fear,withdraw,avoid that which is not logical to our mind/brain (EGO); Lose our childlike wonder about life, our innocence our open willing fearless expressions.
Naturally, this creates tension within our thoughts, the weaker, more preferred ones vs the stronger more passionate ones. As we seek to follow the weaker ones it requires more energy to not give in to the naturally stronger ones and the Inner Battle is waged depleting our energies, rather than simply allowing their magnificance to rein. Logically you would think it easier to engage the stronger thoughts and exert less energy when in fact we burn more energy to avoid this very natural flow? This is logical? Fighting against the more powerful energy source rather than utilizing the flow? The mind/brain (ego) is clearly designed to be an enhancing tool not a generating tool yet it is continued to be used in the opposite manner and the results...... Would you recognize the thoughts generated from your more powerful heart/mind? Though more powerful,they are much more subtle and easily ignored. Can you communicate these thoughts? Can you explain these thoughts? Can you interpret these thoughts?Can you enhance these thoughts with the mind/brain thoughts and enjoy the results? Will you consider and play with these powerful generated thoughts in harmony with the mind/brain thoughts rather than exert extra energy to ignore them? If we want to be energy efficient would this be the next logical step to tapping unused power? Can you tell the difference of the thoughts source, can you learn to hear your hearts thoughts |
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January 2016
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