Well, it took some doing but I was able to find a space and sit in stillness, relax into it (best as I could LOL)breathe deeply,resist the urges to become productive and yes, ironically find a "new" productive. As well as, repeat it, hahaa Repeat, yes repeat........(see previous post for the AhHa). Sometimes in life as unproductive as we may appear in the moment, it can often times yield unimaginable harvests. I think farming/gardening may have mastered these dormant phases,mmm an area to investigate. So much to integrate, the energies not yet finding words,however, a contentness, peacefullness, assuredness,maybe trusting in surrendering process.......can be achieved,ok, maybe I should breathe a bit hear.

See that is what this seems like, a scene of a beautiful glass-like surface of a slow moving river, there is a constant life force flowing yet it is not necessarily obvious to the eyes,just felt in understanding,that there is more going on than what I see, think, hear, or can put into words.....But, fail you not, by the end of exploration I shall provide the detailed explanations,LOL . Yep, I'm still there simmering under the slumber and snoring a bit to remind, me, you?
I have already been receiving inspirations of the changes that I would like to express on  these pages as we change from the first month of this shift making year to the second month. A bit of a snoring fit,restless rustling, and then, ugh, back to the slumbering, I mean "new" productiveness.

Resounding NO!

Cold, Ice, Snow, little sunlight........sounds like a nightmare,however,in the natural cycles of life it is indeed an imperative phase.
I would love to bypass this solitary confinement yet Bear yells from the cave hibernating is revitalizing. Ugh! I much prefer laying on the ground sun on my face,wind blowing my papers, smelling the dirt, ants crawling on my. OK, well I can do without some things in the great outdoors but all in line of timing divine. Still, can't seem to resist the urge to splurge back into the movement and enjoy being outside without 10lbs of outergear dragging down my rear... My camera doesn't much like this cold and batteries refuse to cooperate so really, how can my walks be productive?
This inner journey of silence and retreat is not my favorite feat. If I could just learn to surrender a little more and no, thank you I need no cheese with my whine.......Pushing and pulling will not do for as I resist the required solice I prolong the enduring, for we mean not to be tolerated we wish to be cherished
.Yes friends, that is a slight tone of frustration you detect underlying a pensive energy waiting to burst at the seams. In the flow of life there is a season for everything, so I am told though I am not quite convinced.No wonder really that I end up round and round, Pete and Repeat were on a boat, Pete fell off and who was left......I say let's throw Repeat off and float easily on in empty possibilities. No wine before it's time. No wonder I never took to such an art!
Oh well, so much for false starts and stops. I have been assured it builds muscle however I think it allows for atrephy. I keep waiting for those gentle winds to grace me, maybe it just isn't my style. Maybe I am just a tornado and thats that. After all the point is to know thyself and express authentically, maybe that is my authentic,there are chicken wings,honey mustard wings and even buffalo wings, who decides which flavor is appropriate or that each has a specific time. That's it, since I am so dramatic, just play the role at hand,on the stage as Bear in hibernating stare,now breathe with ease and try it please?

We Are Creators,To feel satisfaction in this physical existence, We need to create. Now, creating in consciousness,mindfulness,awareness,and responsibly is also a part of the deal. So thank you duality that allows us time to create from both positive and negative intentions and see the results of these positive and negative creations. However,with the shifts and speeded accelerations of these times the "time" delays that occur between our etheric creating and the the physical manifesting of these creations is also changing.......SO,this is yep, you guessed it, both positive and negative!!
So this idea of creating as creators offers yep,two concepts to investigate (conscious creating and means of creating) here, well in reality many however,since I was flowing in the duality I thought I shall slip in this tide......
As you go about your day,pause a moment and think about what stage in creation you are experiencing and that which you are trying to create and that which you can direct to that creation of your desire, rather than going through the motions of a to do list, play with it a little and connect the dots of your daily grind with your creating and play with it, responsibly ofcourse!
And, before you say, I am not very creative, rethink of how you may enjoy expressing your creativity as we are ALL creators. You may not be expressing in ways that are outlets that your soul is wanting expressing,dabble and see what may interest you and try it. You do not need to be a professional or earn a living at it to Enjoy the expressions and add a richer dimension of joy to your life. It may also livin' things up a bit at just the idea of searching and trying on new ways. Who knows you may uncover a hidden talent or invent a new one! We are only as limited in expression as we make up our minds to be........Well, within ethical social conduct and laws, however, in your own space............
Much Fun

Sometimes the truth hurts,but always it heals and strengths are revealed. When the truth is acknowledged, felt fully, and lovingly embraced by the heart, it is a lot less time spent in suffering and pain of denying,hiding,lying,or resisting. Deep down the truth is always there,waiting for you to courageously dive in naked and choose acceptance and the ability to heal and move on without remaining stuck in the pain or drawing more of the same, experiences to you begging your attention. Open your heart to the truth from a place of love rather than recoil and withdrawal in fear of what may be revealed. The duration and explosion will not be of such overwhelming intensity. The tree stands strong deeply rooted and bends with the winds. You stand in your power center of choice,take responsibility for your creations,and expand peacefully.
Truth is a deep inside job for which only you direct through your responses,processing and integrating. When you seek the truths from the outside you play victim/victimzer wanting blame and proof. You will snap from the falseness to be drivin back inside where what you seek flows deep.
Much Love

The turtle swims on the surface,spots something interesting in the deep,takes a dive to satisfy the call,knowing all the while,quench your thirst toward the Earth, back to the top,lessons got, rebirth with the breath;to swim the surface again. To be like turtle and flow with the tides of deep under,back afloat;not resisting, just ebb and bob, ebb and bob, seek and find, move on... Being content held lovingly in the freeflowing waters, instinctively knowing when it's time to climb ashore,find a whole in the Earth, sun on a rock, enjoy the land legs;before sliding back into the pond.
Ahhh, to be outside,barefoot in the dirt,splashing my feet in the water,drying in the warmth of the sun,listening to the birds sing me a song.... Ok, so winter to date has been gentle, but the other day of 50, being out seeing the signs of Spring can really mess with a gal's timing. The geese were flying North, the people out walking for a breath of fresh air,neighbors chit chatting on the fence about mowing but all the while knowing soon, they would be blowing the snowing.  Which within a 24 hour period was proof. These are indeed accelerated times however, all seasons within one day?? Who's complaining, not this gal who enjoys faster movment. Enough, daydreaming, I am reminded to be where I am fully engaged in the task at hand. It IS January, time for inner explorations,self-reflections,excavating my truths. I will put into motion very soon. Spring will have sprung and this bell will be ready to be rung!
What are you doing to prepare for the thaw? What truths are you learning to craw? What will you fling into the Spring?

Welcome!!
As we step into 2012 no better time to decide that this will BE Your Big You Year!
I have comitted to do just that with myself as I stand on the threshold of Re-Inventing myself from the ground up, yet again however, this time a bit more publically. I have been experiencing great changes in my self for many years. As our lives are always growing and expanding (or trying to,LOL) many of us have been on what seemed a never ending roller coaster of change and adjustment which followed more change and adjustment by yep, you guessed it more change and adjustment.
I have been unfolding my soul in the painful and joyous process of becoming, or awakening,or conscious engagement with life ,or individuation,or reclaiming my true nature, or self-discovery of whom I am not, or cultural clearing,or dying of the false self (ego) ,or healing and wholeness of heart, or whatever you like to define it as. I have found that this occurs naturally for all of us from the day of forgetting (our physical birth) to the day of transitioning ( our physical death). Whether we consciously particpate or not, or if we coercefully interfere with it, it is the organic experience we signed up for (believe it or not).
 I hope to be at a point of stabilization this year where I tip the scale of fully embodying my higher self and living from a higher state of consciousness. However realizing I will continue to grow and expand, address and heal for this is in my philiosophy of the grand dance of life. The journey of experiences rather than an arrival point of destination. As spiritual beings learning to experience as humans, blend our two natures for the mastering of utilizing our energies and those energies around us while learning our lessons of love expressions,striving to obtain healing,peace,and love in sovereign unity,honoring All diversity returning harmony,in balance with Nature and the interconnected web we participate in. WEW!! Really??!!
 It is my intent to use this space to share this process, the learnings gleamed, and the mysteries yet known,and have an outlet to creatively express my passion as well as offer myself to those who are embarking on the path which I have been on as well as those wishing to join and travel together. It is my understanding that the New Way of "earning a living" will be sharing our passions rather than filling a need. So here is my exploration in this possbility, may we co-create our abundance.
May we heal,grow,support and enjoy this adventure home for all the amazing possibility it holds for one and all.
Many Blessings!